"A skilled military operation cultivates the Tao, yet preserves the Methods. Thus, one can become master of victory and defeat."
- Sun Tzu

A popular notion in self-help and positive psychology is the concept that our feelings about the world is determined by our perspective - that is, how we judge it. This is a concept best expressed by Shakespeare in Hamlet when the titular character tells us: "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." That is to say, if we think, or judge, an event to be bad, then we will feed bad (angry, anxious, etc.) about it.

Thus, we are told, if we want to feel better about a situation, then we need to shift our perspective and view it differently. Cognitive behavioral psychologists call this technique "reframing." It involves taking a step back or away from the situation so that we can view it more objectively or positively. The more objectively or positively we view a situation, then the more objectively or positively we will feel, and thus respond, to the situation.

So how does reframing work? Like trying on new glasses, you try different perspectives to help you view the situation differently. For example, if someone cuts you off on the highway, rather than getting upset, you can frame the situation differently saying: "Maybe this driver is an urgent situation or didn't see me."

Or if you miss your bus, rather than get upset or anxious, you can frame the situation differently by saying: "Oh well, now I can get more reading done as I wait for the next bus to come."

Or if you find out your star-colleague just quit her job, rather than panic for the work you might have to fill in for, you can frame it differently and say, "This gives me an opportunity to step up and improve my skills."  

On the surface, reframing makes sense. And indeed, it is a very effective tool for helping us feel and respond differently to situations that befall us. The problem with reframing, though, is that it doesn't address the real reason why we need to use the technique in the first place - the fact that we become rattled, angry, worried, etc. to the event in the first place.

Why would we get upset when a driver cuts us off? Why would we panic if we miss our bus or a colleague leaves?

The reason why we get emotional in these situations is not because of our thoughts, but because these emotions are natural responses to situations in which we feel a lack of control. As human beings, we have an inherent need to feel a sense of control over our situation - ourselves, our relationships, our future.

This need is tied to our sense of calmness and well-being. When we feel in control of a situation, we feel calm and confident. When we don't, we feel emotional, anxious, upset. As bestselling author Robert Greene writes in The 48 Laws of Power, “The feeling of having no power over people and events is generally unbearable to us – when we feel helpless, we feel miserable.”

No amount of reframing is going to get rid of this need. And no amount of objectivity or positive thinking is going to overcome it. These things may help us feel better about the situation and view it more calmly or positively, but unless we acknowledge and address this underlying need, we will always be at struggle with ourselves to maintain this positive or calm attitude.

So how then do we approach situations that rattle us and gain real calm and composure? Or is the situation hopeless? As you can imagine, Sun Tzu provides a way.

For Sun Tzu, the role of the general is to ensure the nation's security (an). He does this first by examining the Way (Tao). For Sun Tzu, this means understanding the purpose by which the ruler commands and unifies the people. If the purpose is clear and strong, then the Way forward is clear. Any events that occur - whether fortunate or not - will be reflected clearly in light of the Way.

Next, he gathers as much information and intelligence as he can - about the ground, about the weather, about the enemy, about his own army and nation.

Lastly, he takes this information and analyzes it, asking questions: What are we trying to do or achieve? What are all the obstacles we face? Where is the enemy strong or weak? Where are we strong or weak?

Based on his answers to these questions, he develops a response to whatever situation is in front of him.

This whole process is predicated on understanding the Way - that is, understanding how the ruler seeks to lead the people and whether this leadership is strong and clear. Without the Way, the whole analysis becomes useless.

Likewise, this is the approach we need to take in our own lives. When an event occurs, we need to ask ourselves not simply "How can I view this differently?", but rather: "What does this mean in terms of my purpose?" How does it affect my path forward? Then we can better understand our own feelings and determine a response.

If your sense of purpose is clear, then the meaning or impact of the event will be clearer to you. It won't easily shake you, because you'll have greater certainty of where you are on the path.

As a result, you won't need to "reframe" your thinking after the event occurs, because your sense of purpose becomes your primary frame, your Way. It is the perspective by which you view life.

If your sense of purpose is not clear, then it is important to go back to step one and ask: What is my purpose? What am I trying to ultimately do or achieve in life, and why? While reframing may help you in the moment to deal with a difficult situation, no amount of reframing is going to give you the answer to this question.

And it is only by cultivating a deep sense of purpose that you'll be able to find real calm or peace.

​It can be tedious to remember all the methods, rules, tactics, and wisdom from Sun Tzu when you are in the middle of facing a crisis or problem. One simple question I like to ask myself when I face different scenarios is: What would a skilled warrior (shàn zhàn zhě) of life do? 

How would a skilled warrior of life respond or react to this problem? Would they respond with anger? Would they ignore it? How would they deal with it?

(An alternative question to ask, which is just as effective, is: What would Sun Tzu do?)

If I wish to be a skilled warrior of life, I need to know how would a skilled warrior act. What kind of choices would they make? 

For example, if someone says something that annoys me or makes me feel insecure, my initial reaction may be to be angry or defensive. However, is that how would a skilled warrior of life act? Or would they think through the situation, try to understand why they feel a certain way, listen to the advice, and try to move on?

Asking this question repeatedly allows me to rethink and readjust my identity. Once I understand who I aspire to be, it becomes easier to make different choices.

For Sun Tzu, emotions can be very dangerous. They can cloud one's judgment and push one to act rashly in the face of crises or challenges one may face.

On the other hand, emotions can also be powerful tools. Used correctly, they can motivate you to overcome opposition, connect you with others, and enjoy life better.

So what's the best way to manage your emotions? How do you keep your emotions from putting you in a worse position? And how do you use them to better your situation?

The following are four key lessons I've ​taken from The Art of War on controlling my emotions:

1. Emotions are informative.
2. Refrain from making decisions based on your emotions.
3. Let flow.
4. Channel your emotional energy for the right time and place.

Let's go through each lesson in greater depth.

Lesson 1: Emotions are informative.
As human beings, we are emotional creatures. Everything we experience is colored by our emotions. All of our emotions - whether positive or negative - are natural and even healthy. The problem is that we don't much understand our emotions and what they can tell us about ourselves.

There is much scientific research into the purpose of emotions, which I won't go into here. However, the most important thing to understand about emotions is that they are reactions to our sense of control over ourselves, others, or our environment. In particular, they tell you how secure or insecure you feel about whatever situation you are in.

So, anxiety, for example, comes from one's insecurity towards controlling or knowing the outcome of a situation, especially if the situation or the outcome could be negative. Anger is a natural reaction to someone or something not conforming or complying with our own standards we project onto the world.

Excitement, which is actually a form of anxiety, comes from how insecure we feel towards a desirable outcome that we feel or know is very possible, even likely. Contentment is a general feeling that things are under control, that no surprises are lurking in background.

Thus, emotions are very important because they inform us of how we are - consciously or unconsciously - feeling about a situation. For Sun Tzu, this information is incredibly important. As he tells us, "Know the other, know the self, and your victory will not be in danger." Knowing oneself - in Sun Tzu's case, knowing one's army - lets the general know where the mindset of his soldiers are. Are they scared? Are they angry? Are they anxious? Are they calm and ready? Asking these questions lets him understand if his soldiers are ready for battle, or if they need to be trained more, or if they need to move to a different ground, etc.

Likewise, for yourself, you should also ask yourself similar questions. Whenever you have a strong emotional reaction, you should ask yourself:

1. What emotion am I feeling right now?
2. What does this emotion tell me about myself and my situation?
3. Do I tend to feel this way in these types of situations?

 
In this sense, your emotions are a window into your mind. Investigating why you get upset when someone cuts you off in traffic or why you get so excited when you meet a new guy or girl helps you understand your tendencies better. You can start to see patterns in your behavior ("I always seem to feel this way in these types of situations"). This allows you to gain some distance from yourself and potentially break these patterns.

That is how you stay responsive to your situation - able to adapt.

Lesson 2: Refrain from making decisions based on your emotions.
While your emotions are natural, healthy, and informative, making decisions based on your emotions - i.e. how you're feeling - is not effective or strategic. Indeed, doing so can lead to worse and more disastrous consequences than you intended.

While emotions are good windows into your mind (if you have the discipline to try to understand them), they often do not give a clear or accurate interpretation of your situation. The person who didn't send you an invite to their party, for example, might have been trying to slight you - or they may have legitimately forgot to send you one. The girl or guy who gave you a compliment on your outfit may have been trying to flirt with you - or they were just being nice.

In addition, acting from your emotions also tends to make you look weak or vulnerable in front of others. If people know that you are controlled by your emotions, then they can figure out what to say or do to manipulate you.

In warfare, both of these consequences are dangerous. If a general makes decisions based on his emotions, rather than on clear intelligence from his spies and local guides, then he risks putting the whole army, as well as the nation, in danger. Likewise, if the enemy knows that the general is emotional, he can use that to exploit the general's weaknesses.

This is why, for Sun Tzu, you must refrain as much as possible from making decisions based on your emotions. Sun Tzu offers clear guidelines for when you should take action: "If there is no advantage, do not move. If there is nothing to gain, do not mobilize. If there is no danger, do not battle."

Whenever you are in an emotional state, you have to ask yourself: "What will I gain by taking action?" What will I gain from responding in anger? What will I gain from constantly checking my phone, waiting for some update on something?

An alternative question is: "What can I lose?" What can I lose from acting out of anger? What can I lose from giving into anxiety or excitement?

Decisions must come through calculation - from gathering intelligence, analyzing one's situation, and choosing the best course of action out of one's options. Emotions may factor into the analysis, but they shouldn't guide it.

Lesson 3: Let flow.
For Sun Tzu, emotions are not permanent states of mind. Rather, they are fluid. As Sun Tzu tells us, "Anger can return to happiness. Resentment can return to contentment." Our natural state is to be happy and content - absent any stress or overt change, that's the state we all tend to go to.

There is a paradox with this, though. If all emotions are natural and healthy, we shouldn't try to repress them or reject them. Rather we should accept and embrace them. On the other hand, if we hold on to negative emotions, like anger or anxiety or depression, we can keep ourselves from getting to a place of contentment and happiness. They can be like poison if we hold on to them for too long.

The key is to acknowledge the emotion - that is, to acknowledge how you feel, without  any judgment - and give yourself time for the emotion to dissipate. I call this technique letting flow.

First, you have to acknowledge what emotion you are feeling. Are you feeling angry? Hurt? Sad? Heartbroken? Disappointed?

Next, explore the emotion. What is it about the situation that, you feel, sparked this emotion in you? Was it that someone said or did something that bothered you? Was it that you were hoping for one result and got another? Was it that you feel you've lost something? It helps to write this down, either in a journal or in a letter to the person at whom you're upset. The key is not to judge your response, but to accept it as how you currently feel.

Next, you have to give yourself time by distracting yourself from the situation. Maybe you need to take a break. Maybe you can take a walk or run or swim. Maybe you can play a game or an instrument. Whatever it is, you have to put some distance between you and the situation.

After awhile, you can return back to the situation and see if your feelings have changed. Has the intensity of the emotion gone down? Are you still as upset as you were? Are you still as disappointed? If yes, then that's good. You'll probably be in a much better place to deal with the situation. If not, then you need more time.

The ultimate point you want to reach is the ability to take time away from the situation and come back and reflect on the situation. Ask yourself: is there a chance that I am responsible for what happened? Is there something I might have done to have caused the situation to happen?

By following this technique consistently, you are preventing your negative emotions from festering. By acknowledging, exploring, giving yourself some time, and then coming back to reflect, you are letting these emotions flow and dissipate. Just like a ripple in a pond, the pond will come back to a calm, peaceful state - but only if you let it.

Lesson 4: Channel your emotional energy for the right time and place.
For Sun Tzu, emotions are not just informative. Rather, they can be powerful forces to tip the scales of victory in your favor - if you use them at the right time and place.

A general, for example, wants his soldiers to be ready and fierce when it comes to battle. He wants them to be motivated to win. He does this by putting his soldiers in danger, where there is no escape, so that their courage outweighs their fear of death. Likewise, the general wants to use his soldiers' excitement and desire to enjoy the spoils of war as a motivating force for getting them to steal from and feed off the enemy.

In your own life, your positive emotions can assist you when taking action. Excitement can be a motivating force for preparing yourself for an opportunity - a job interview, a promotion, a new business prospect. Maintaining a positive, upbeat mood can be very helpful in displaying confidence to others.

Even using anxiety and anger can be helpful. Allowing for some anxiety pushes you to be cautious in your decision-making, and maintaining some anger, especially when acting in opposition to someone, can be helpful in clarifying in your mind who your enemy is.

The key is never to let your emotions guide you. You should only be guided by your calculations - what you've assessed, using reliable information, to be the best path forward.  Your emotions should only assist you when you're deciding to take action. In this way, they become an extra-boost that gives you an advantage in whatever endeavor you're trying to do.

"In battle, chaos is produced from order, cowardice is produced from bravery, and weakness is produced from strength. Chaos from order is a matter of calculation. Cowardice from bravery is a matter of force. Weakness from strength is a matter of positioning."
- Sun Tzu

As we see from the passage above, for Sun Tzu, achieving continual success in battle involves three critical skills, or disciplines, that every general must practice and be proficient at. These disciplines are calculation (jì), positioning (xing), and timing (jie).

In life, these disciplines can be applied the same way to the challenges you face. Because life is so often filled with daily battles, success in life depends on your mastery of these critical skills.

Let's go in depth into each of these disciplines and how they can apply to your life.

The Discipline of Calculation
For Sun Tzu, the discipline of calculation (jì) involves using spies to gather intelligence about the enemy and one's environment, assessing this intelligence by way of the five factors (The Way, Heaven, Ground, General, and Methods), and developing a fluid strategy that adapts to the enemy. Doing this allows you to understand what needs to be done in order to achieve success.

In life, calculation involves gathering information about your situation, assessing this information, and developing a practical strategy for moving forward. For Sun Tzu, success depends on one's ability to understand one's situation and turn that understanding into action.

In my own life, I use what I call the SPAR Approach to develop the discipline of calculation. This approach involves looking at your situation, categorizing it, finding the key principles that you need to focus on, and developing a plan of action which you can measure and evaluate. By practicing this approach as a feedback loop, I get better and better at making effective plans of action.

The Discipline of Positioning
The discipline of positioning (xing) involves two key features: 1) protecting the army from the dangers of defeat and 2) building one's skills, knowledge, allies, and resources. Doing these two things allows you to make success feasible.

In your own life, this same discipline applies. With every plan, you must consider the risks involved with taking action. As your plan takes into account how to deal with the risks, your plan becomes stronger since it anticipates the barriers that may try to stop it from succeeding.

In addition, you must think about the capabilities - skills, knowledge, resources, connections - you need in order to be successful.

In my own life, I cultivate the discipline of positioning by asking myself two critical questions:

1. What dangers or risks do I face?
2. What capabilities do I need to succeed?

In repeatedly asking these questions, I can develop a picture of what areas I need to focus on.

The Discipline of Timing
The discipline of timing (jie) involves understanding when to take action and when not to take action - that is, when to mobilize, when to attack, when to fight, when to surprise, and when to simply stay still or withdraw. Understanding timing and taking action when only when the time is right is what makes success extremely likely, maybe even inevitable.

In life, timing is just as critical. Knowing when to speak up and when to shut up, when to act and when to sit still, when to stand up and when to sit down - having this skill is what makes or breaks a plan or strategy. It is a knowledge that comes with experience - from making mistakes oneself, but also from observing the mistakes and foibles of others.

In my own life, to develop the discipline of timing, I actively read the successful (and unsuccessful) strategies of successful (or unsuccessful) people in history. In addition, I also search the internet for Do's and Dont's when it comes to certain ideas I have. I try to look at different sources that explain their reasoning from different perspectives. This allows me to develop a more comprehensive picture of the problem and more fully anticipate the dangers of either taking action or not taking action in a given situation.
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In short, the three disciplines mentioned above, when practiced consistently, can help you in making effective decisions and achieving a sense of security about your situation.

"I, by means of these questions, know who will win or lose."
- Sun Tzu

For Sun Tzu, achieving success in war starts with asking questions and analyzing your situation. By asking the right questions and finding the right answers through investigation, you can develop a complete understanding of your situation and decide the right course of action.

From this, the following are four simple questions, inspired by The Art of War, that I ask myself regularly whenever I am trying to achieve success in something - whether it's a project, a goal, or a long-term aspiration.

Here are the questions:

1. What are you trying to do or achieve, and why? This question helps you clarify your purpose. Sit with this one for awhile. Don't move forward unless your answer feels right to you.
2. What dangers or risks do you face? List as many dangers and risks as you possibly can. For Sun Tzu, understanding and preparing for the dangers or obstacles you may face makes you stronger and more prepared.
3. What capabilities - skills, knowledge, resources, contacts - do you need to avoid or overcome these dangers or risks and move forward? Success, for Sun Tzu, doesn't come from luck. It comes from having the skills and knowledge you need to recognize and take advantage of opportunities.
4. What little things I can either do or stop doing right now to make progress? Progress is often achieved little by little, day by day. One more contact to add to your network counts. One less unhealthy food to eat today counts. One more positive conversation with your boss counts. One less mess in your house or office counts. Don't underestimate the power of slow progress. Of course, if you can do more and get more and you can do so quickly, by all means, you should do so. But if you are having a hard time starting, don't start big. Start small. Very small. And keep doing small things.

Don't be fooled by the simplicity of these questions. Ask yourself these questions often and you'll start to see improvement.

"Anger can return to happiness. Resentment can return to content."
- Sun Tzu

If there were a list of emotions to describe how many people feel in today's world, anger would probably be near the top of the list. Everyone feels angry - angry at the government, at the opposing political party, at greedy corporations, at our neighbors, at our bosses or coworkers, at our spouses, at life in general.

Even more, we all tend to feel justified in feeling angry. We all feel justified in cursing the person who cuts us off or yelling at the "idiot" online who spouts something "ignorant" in the comments section. We all feel like the world is crazy or unjust and we're the only sane or moral ones.

For Sun Tzu, however, no emotion is more destructive to acquiring a sense of peace and security (what he calls an) than anger. In war, anger makes us act rashly, put ourselves and others at risk, and ultimately undermine what we are trying to accomplish.

But just what is anger? Why is it so dangerous? And what can we learn from The Art of War in trying to control our anger so that we can cultivate stillness and calm in our lives? The following are three lessons I've learnt from Sun Tzu on controlling my anger:

1. Understand the source of your anger. Understand what anger is and deep, emotional need it stems from inside you.
2. Shift your values. Move away from the idea that you have to take revenge on the person that causes your anger. Focus instead on what you will actually gain from (not) taking a certain action.
3. Make controlling your anger a game. Reward yourself on your ability to control your anger. View this ability as an essential skill in achieving happiness and success in life, with showing compassion for people who irritate or bother you as the ultimate sign of this skill.

​Let's view each lesson in depth.

Lesson 1: Understand the source of your anger
The first step to controlling one's anger is to understand what it is and where it comes from.

Truth is, anger is a difficult emotion to define. Everyone knows what anger looks like - yelling, cursing, insulting, violent outbursts, rage. But this is simply how anger manifests itself. Something deeper is going on.

Quite simply, anger is an emotion that occurs when something doesn't go the way we believe it should go, or want or "need" it to go. It is our emotional reaction to when someone or something violates an underlying belief we have about how the world should or needs to operate world.

All anger betrays a hidden ideal - one we are emotionally invested in and feel the world should conform to. When you get angry, for example, at someone cutting you off in traffic, your reaction betrays an underlying belief in a standard of behavior on the road where people should drive respectfully and safely, not carelessly or selfishly.

Thus, anger is usually tied to a feeling of justice. We feel justified in showing our displeasure at others (honking, giving the finger, yelling, etc.) - to make them feel discomfort or even pain at having violated our ideal.

Even deeper, though, is what a person or thing's violation of our ideal means to us, on a deep, albeit unconscious level. The ideals we hold about how the world should operate usually relate to our emotional wants and needs - whether we are conscious of this or not. Thus, someone violating our ideals demonstrates, to us, a lack of care for - or even a refusal to care for - our emotional wants and needs.

So, for example, our angry response at someone cutting us off in traffic reveals an emotional need for respect. Our angry response at an opposing political party reveals our need to be considered and recognized. Our angry response at losing a game reveals our underlying need to win, to conquer, to be seen as the best.

Thus, if you want to control your anger, the first thing to do is understand what's the source of your anger. Ask yourself:

• What are the situations that tend to get me angry? Why?
• What standard or expectation do I have that gets me angry when someone or something violates it?
• What does this standard or expectation reveal about my own emotional needs?

Write your response down and take some time to reflect and see if it rings true. For myself, I tend to get angry when I feel people question or insult my intelligence (e.g. with sarcasm). This reveals a deep emotional need to have people recognize my intelligence, how smart I am.

Going through these questions won't get rid of your anger, but it puts distance between you and your anger, giving you more power over it. 

Lesson 2: Shift your values
For Sun Tzu, anger is dangerous for two reasons:

1. Anger betrays an underlying difficulty with accepting reality. When you are angry, you are literally struggling with accepting the fact that someone cut you off or forgot to call you back or ignored you, etc. Behind every instance of anger is disbelief. Staying too long in anger only extends this difficulty with accepting things as they are, thus not allowing us to adapt to the actual reality we are facing. In war, this is very dangerous, as anger can cloud our understanding and lead us to make rash or faulty decision-making, rising lives and the security of the nation.
2. Anger leads you towards destructive behavior. Anger always tends to make us more aggressive, more violent, more vengeful, more willing to dole out insult or pain. For Sun Tzu, the general's aim is not to destroy the enemy - that takes up precious resources. Rather, the aim is to win without battle, making the nation stronger and more secure than it was before the conflict. Sometimes this requires making peace with one's enemy, reducing any tensions or animosity. Acting from anger, however, undermines this; doing it will only intensify the tension, not de-escalate it.

Given this, there are two questions we need to ask ourselves: How do I stop myself from getting angry? And if I do get angry, how do I stop myself from acting from anger?

For Sun Tzu, preventing yourself from getting angry requires shifting your values. The reason why we indulge anger, letting it boil until we react, is because we value revenge or aggression in the face of someone violating our standards or expectations. We feel justified in taking action against someone.

The problem is that taking revenge does very little to make you stronger, better, or more secure later. This is the value you need to focus on and cultivate in your daily life: making gains. As Sun Tzu tells us, "Killing the enemy is a matter of anger. Taking the enemy's advantages is a matter of profit."

For Sun Tzu, the wise general doesn't value death or destruction, but profit and security. He isn't focused on how to get the enemy back or whether the enemy's situation is worse. Rather, he focuses on whether he and his army have made or can make any gains. He asks: Are we stronger? Is our position more secure? Are we in a better position to attack and win? Do we have a greater advantage over the enemy?

Sun Tzu gives us a simple rule:

"If there is no advantage, do not move. If there is nothing to gain, do not mobilize. If there is no danger, do not battle."

The wise general never acts from anger, but only from profit - the ability to actually gain advantage or make progress.

In your own life, you must ask yourself continually: Am I getting better? Am I getting smarter? Am I more confident? Will taking this action give me greater or lesser peace or security?

The more you think from the perspective of making gains, the harder it will be to stay angry or get angry in the first place. You'll realize that getting angry will gain you nothing, even if it means hurting whoever got you upset. The enemy losing doesn't mean anything. What matters is only if you have gained something - something positive, helpful, useful.

Lesson 3: Make controlling your anger a game
Of course, there will be times when you will get angry and you will be tempted to act from your anger. In these situations, Sun Tzu suggests making a game of your situation.

For Sun Tzu, one of the best ways to gain in war is by stealing the opponent's resources. Thus, he advises a general to create a system where the first unit to capture enemy soldiers or enemy weapons will get a reward. In addition, he advises the general to instruct his soldiers to value the enemy's food as if it were worth twenty times their own food.

You too can apply the same principle to your own life. In my own life, for example, one game I play is that I give myself a point if, when I am angry or irritated because of something someone says or does, I simply am able to keep my cool and not say anything in response. If I can leave that situation without arguing or saying something sarcastic, I get one point. I give myself two points if I can even be nice to person.

The ultimate test of your skill in controlling your anger is if you can cultivate compassion for those with whom you're angry. So one game, if you want to get better at this, is, when you're feeling angry or annoyed at someone, to try to see things from the other person's perspective or situation. Ask yourself: maybe this person had a bad day, or this person was not raised the same way, or this person is not trying to be malicious but just made an honest mistake. Or maybe - just maybe - this person may actually have a point, something to be considered.

In short, understanding the source of your anger, shifting your values and focus, and playing these kinds of anger control games are useful in getting you to shift away from revenge or violence and move towards Sun Tzu's ultimate goal - strength and security (an).

The Sun Tzu Way is, at its core, designed to be a practical philosophy of life. As such, there are a number of practices or exercises you can implement in your life to give you greater clarity, calm, and confidence. In my own life, there are five exercises I try to use on a regular basis:

1. Cultivate your Tao
2. Find your high ground
3. Play the spy
4. Contemplate the dangers
5. Put yourself on death ground

Let's look at each exercise in depth.

EXERCISE 1: CULTIVATE YOUR TAO
"A skilled military operation cultivates the Tao, yet preserves the Methods. Thus, one can become master of victory and defeat."
- Sun Tzu

For Sun Tzu, Tao, or the Way, refers to one's sense of purpose - what one is trying to do or achieve and why. To cultivate your Tao means to regularly bring it to mind, see its application in everything you do, and to adjust your understanding of it with new experiences. In other words, it's to live and breathe it. 

For me, I cultivate my Tao by reviewing and editing my personal philosophy statement on a regular basis (usually every week or so). This statement is a document on my Google Drive that outlines:

• What I feel I'm on this planet to do
• My values
• My aspirations
• My main priorities

Not everything I do will align with this statement. But reviewing it regularly, I am able to see if I'm going off track and if I need to reduce some responsibilities or habits. It helps to keep my eye on the ball.

You don't need to follow my statement, but I suggest that you also have a personal philosophy statement and that you review it regularly.

EXERCISE 2: FIND YOUR HIGH GROUND
"In general, the winning army prefers the high ground and hates the low, values the sunny side and despises the dark."
- Sun Tzu

Life can be stressful and chaotic at times. It can be demoralizing, anxiety-provoking, and frustrating. It can throw you challenge after challenge until you just want to disengage, procrastinate, lash out in anger, or complain.

For Sun Tzu, true strength comes from a calm, focused mind. As he tells us, "Using discipline, await disorder. Using calm, await clamor. Such is managing the mind." When the world throws obstacle after obstacle at you, you must approach each with a steady mind.

Getting to a calm, focused place requires what I call "finding your high ground." Just as Sun Tzu advises positioning the army on the high, sunny ground where the army has greater visibility, finding your high ground means using a reliable practice that you know always helps give you a sense of clarity and calm.

For example, some people gain clarity when they go out for a run. Some people gain it through cleaning or organizing their space. Others gain it by brainstorming or doing a to-do list.

Personally, I gain it by wrestling with my thoughts and frustrations, either on a long walk or through writing my thoughts down. In talking to myself, I start to articulate my problems and feel greater clarity in dealing with them.

Whatever your practice is, you need to clearly define it and use it whenever you feel stressed, anxious, upset, or frustrated. Doing it may not solve your problem, but it will help get you into a headspace where you have the clarity and confidence to deal with it. 

EXERCISE 3: PLAY THE SPY
"What enables the enlightened rulers and good generals to conquer the enemy at every move and achieve extraordinary success is foreknowledge."
- Sun Tzu

For Sun Tzu, knowledge is the key to any kind of success. And for him, it does no good to try to gain knowledge just when you need it the most. This is why, in his time, leaders would have a network of spies already in place to inform them of any important information that may threaten their nation's security.

Likewise, so that you are never caught unaware, you need to play the spy yourself. You must always be listening to things that may help or hurt your situation. This is how you gain wisdom (zhi).

Playing the spy doesn't mean that you are trying to "uncover" secret information from others or anything insidious like that. Rather it means always being observant and vigilant. It means

• listening more than you talk, and listening between the lines of what people are saying
• paying attention to body language, tone, and other nonverbal cues in conversation
• capturing useful information - from books, from videos, from conversations - and storing it in a place where you can access or review later
• asking probing questions about what a person feels or thinks and refraining as much as possible from butting in with your own opinions or thoughts. 

Playing the spy also can be turned to yourself. You can use it to capture your thoughts and feelings in a journal or diary, or to ask probing questions like, "Why do I feel this way? Where does this feeling come from? Why did I react like that? Why do I think x, y, z?"  

In my own life, for example, I use my notes app on my phone to write down suggestions people say, thoughts I'm having, resources to read later on, pieces of a conversation that stick with me.

Overall, the motto of a good spy is, "Every interaction is an opportunity to learn." Repeating this motto to yourself is a good way to stay observant and keep on the lookout for opportunities or dangers that may be lurking about.

EXERCISE 4: CONTEMPLATE THE DANGERS
"Therefore, one who does not fully know the dangers of using the army cannot fully know the advantages of using the army."
- Sun Tzu

This exercise involves accounting for the risks or dangers involved in taking on any endeavor - whether it be a project, a goal, or an idea - before you take on the endeavor. For Sun Tzu, it's by contemplating the dangers of the endeavor that we can actually strengthen our plans and thus increase our likelihood of success.

Afraid you won't know what to talk about on a date? Write up a list of topics and questions to ask if the conversation dries up.

Worried that the hiring manager for an interview may ask why you're leaving your current job, which you hate? Come up with a strong response that explains your decision to advance your career.

Worried that a project at work may derail? Set up regular check-ins to monitor progress.

There's a second benefit to contemplating the dangers: it prepares you for the possibility that things can, and probably will, go wrong. It reminds you that nothing ever goes smoothly and you will encounter hiccups on the way. Being ready for that keeps you sharp and ready to adapt.

EXERCISE 5: PUT YOURSELF ON DEATH GROUND
"On death ground, fight."
- Sun Tzu

Although the Sun Tzu Way is, at its core, a philosophy of life, in many ways, it is also a reflection on death. For Sun Tzu, war is a grave matter. Not only are soldiers' lives at stake, but the lives of the people.

But death, for Sun Tzu, can also be a unifying force that pressures the army to focus their energy and fight with full strength. At the heel of death, even cowardly soldiers become courageous, since they have nothing to lose. This is why Sun Tzu tells us that the role of the general is throw his soldiers into danger.

You too can put yourself on death ground and let it motivate you to go all in on an endeavor. In my own life, I try to put myself on death ground by regularly practicing memento mori (a Latin phrase that translates to "Remember you will die"). It's an ancient practice that involves keeping death at the forefront of your mind by imagining your death or meditating on your mortality. Although it sounds morbid, the idea is to remind yourself that life is fleeting and that if you want to accomplish something, you have to move now before it's too late.

Another way to put yourself on death ground is to give yourself tight deadlines on projects or goals (the deadlines should make you uncomfortable), and to have some big consequence (e.g. giving money to an organization whose values you despise, taking a bet) if you fail to complete or achieve the project or goal.

In Western culture, there is usually a separation between risk and reward. One strives for the reward despite the risks. One braves the journey despite ​the dangers. One strives to win that marathon despite the risk of exhaustion. One strives to climb the mountain despite the risk of death due to injury, climate, starvation. One strives to publish one’s book despite the risk of no one wanting to buy it.

With this mindset, it is the commitment to achieving the reward that is seen as the primary reason for success. It’s the commitment to getting to that finish line, reaching the top of that mountain, getting on that bestsellers list.

For Sun Tzu, on the other hand, there is an important relationship between risk and reward. As Sun Tzu tells us, “One who does not fully know the dangers of using the army cannot fully know the advantages of using the army.”

In other words, risk and reward, danger and advantage, are inversely related. It is by calculating and managing or eliminating the risks that one actually reaps the reward. This is what Sun Tzu refers to as "contemplating the dangers."

So, for example, it is by running daily, working one’s way up to running multiple marathons in practice, understanding the dangers involved and mitigating these dangers, that one actually is able to get to the end of the marathon.

It is by imagining and predicting all the potential disasters of climbing a mountain, studying all that one can of the territory and what has stopped people before, and creating a plan that deals with those potential disasters, that one actually has a much greater chance of making it to the top.

It is by understanding one’s market intimately, garnering enough committed interest in one’s book before one publishes, that one actually creates a bestselling book.

With this mindset, the commitment to achieving the reward isn’t the primary reason for success. Rather, it’s the commitment to creating a strong plan. Such a plan must be guided by the risks and dangers you may face on your journey to success.

In short, the idea behind good planning is not to achieve success, but to make success feasible. Once it’s feasible, then all that’s required is the commitment (and willingness to adapt) to make success happen.

"In general, the winning army prefers the high ground and hates the low, values the sunny side and despises the dark."
- Sun Tzu

For Sun Tzu, the most advantageous position for an army is on the high, sunny ground, facing the enemy. This position offers the army the greatest amount of elevation and visibility, so that they can clearly see the enemy and their situation. 

The high ground is as much psychological as it is physical. It refers to a position where you have the most clarity, allowing you to cultivate a sense of stillness.

In life, we also have a high ground. The reason why so many of us feel lost in life is because we don’t have a strong sense of what’s true to us and what’s not. Your high ground is that purpose and truth.

To identify and take your high ground, ask yourself: What principle, value, or practice do I have that, when I follow it, always gives me a sense of clarity or purpose?

For me, taking the high ground comes often through talking to myself - literally - either by taking a walk by myself or journaling my thoughts. Because my mind is often very noisy, working out my thoughts through self-talk allows me to clear my head and focus.

For other people, taking the high ground occurs through physical exercise. When they exercise, they can see their life more clearly because moving their body helps them process their thinking.

For others, it may occur through meditation. Through deep breathing and clearing out mental clutter, they are able to become in tune with their purpose.

For others, it may be a matter of following your gut, or intuition. When they sense something is right or off, they must follow it.

For other people, it’s the scientific method. They have to observe – see, feel, hear – something for themselves, run experiments, test new ideas out, in order to gain clarity.

For other people, it happens through organization and preparation. They need to map out things, see them physically, in order to gain clarity.

Everyone’s high ground is different and may change as time goes by. The point is that you need something solid, something you know you can rely on, to give you that sense of clarity and balance.

That is the source of your power.